My Dam Run

I ran Dam to Dam yesterday! For those of you who aren't familiar with Des Moines, Dam to Dam is an annual run that goes from Saylorville Lake north of town to downtown Des Moines (dams in both locations... go figure). It ends up being 12.42 miles. It's kind of a big deal around these parts, especially this year, because it was the 30th anniversary. And it was kind of a big deal for me, because it was my first time running it. And it was my second official long run ever (the first one shouldn't even count it went so badly). So I rolled out of bed at 4:45 a.m. Saturday morning, when most sane people are still curled up in their cozy comforters dreaming about Brandon Flowers (maybe that's just specific to me) and sort of kind of brushed my teeth - I don't really do anything well at 4:45 in the morning - and picked out the flavors of GU that I thought would be most likely to not wind up in a regurgitated splatter on the pavement. Those would be Lemon-Lime, Orange Vanilla and Espresso Love, for those of you keeping track. We were just about ready to leave the house when I noticed that I had an alarming new vent in my pants running from crotch to mid-thigh. Where the hell did that come from, and how long have I been running in them like that?! Luckily, it was along the seam so I was able to stitch it up real quick. I bet not many of you were up at 5:15 a.m. on Saturday doing a little sewing. I have to say I'm jealous.

After that minor crisis, we headed for another one: NO COFFEE PLACES WERE OPEN. At this

point it was after 5:30, and not one damn gas station was open so I could grab a cup of coffee! Starbucks wasn't even open, and they're supposed to open at 5:30! I was not a happy camper for two reasons - 1., I wanted that cup of coffee for the burst of energy it gives you before a run. Studies have

shown that it's really helpful. 2., I'm a major addict and was pretty sure my massive, blinding, lack-of-caffeine headache would take me out of the race by the half-mile marker if I didn't ingest something caffeinated. I. Was. Cranky. And Starbucks, I am PISSED at you. Not pissed enough to not get a java chip frap after the race yesterday, but pissed nonetheless.

Anyway, I had no choice but to get on the bus to take me out to Saylorville without my cup o' joe. The bus ride was kind of excruciating, because as it takes you further and further away from downtown Des Moines, you can't help but think, "I have to RUN all of this?" Downtown passes by, I-80 passes by, Johnston passes by, suddenly you're in the country, and you realize that you're going to have to run back through all of it. Kind of daunting. But then you get to Saylorville and the crowd of people all gathered for the same cause - to murder their knees and provoke exercise-induced asthma - kind of makes you forget all of the running.

It's just cool that there were more than 7,000 people all willing - all excited, even - to suffer through the same thing. That's them in the first picture, waiting to use to the kybos.

So the race started at 7:00 sharp, but I didn't cross the start mat until 7:05 and some change. They very wisely group you by your predicted finish time, so people with yellow bibs are the super fast competitors and are grouped at the front; people with green are quick runners grouped in the middle; people with blue are average runners grouped near the back, etc. I was a Blue. I will probably always be a Blue. The picture on the above right is what the starting line looks like from the perspective of a Blue.

So, here's a brief synopsis of how the run went:

Mile 1: Just barely across the dam. Body: "That was awesome! 11 more of these, are you kidding? Piece of cake!" Brain: "You have no idea what you're talking about. Just STFU and keep moving, please."

Mile 2: Body: "I'm awesome!!!!" Brain: "I SAID SHUT IT."

Mile 3: Body: "Did she say 33:something minutes? Minus my five since I didn't actually start until 7:05, that's like 9:30 miles! Go me!!" Brain: "Yeah, just do this three more times and we're good to go." Body: "...did you say THREE more times?"

Mile 6: Crossing I-80, which is the picture above. At this point I was still under 10-minute miles. Maybe that's not great for some people, but for me to sustain an under-10 for six miles is really good. Brain: "YES!!! We are doing great!!" Body: "I'm not so sure about that..."

Mile 7: Brain: "Hey! Civilization!" Body: "Is civilization going to help us finish this race?"

Brain: "...No?" Body: [groans]

Mile 8: Body: "WTF IS THAT HILL." Brain: "You run steeper hills than this all of the time. Just keep plugging away and you'll make it." Body: "I run steeper hills than this TWO MILES into our run, not EIGHT. Fuck it, we're walking it."

Mile 9: Brain: "It's so nice that all of these people showed up to cheer us on!" Body: "ALL OF THOSE PEOPLE CAN DIE."

Mile 10: Brain: "Two more miles!! That's nothing!" Body: "Technically it's 2.42 miles. I'm not stupid. And I'm no longer speaking to you."

Mile 11: Brain: "OK, quit your bitching. Here's some GU to get you through the last little bit." Body: "Mmm, espresso!! This is the best-tasting GU I've ever had! Or perhaps I'm just delirious!" Also, I got Mardi Gras beads at mile 11. And I didn't even have to show my boobs. No one would have wanted to see my boobs at that point anyway.

Mile 11.42: We got little cups of champagne to celebrate the "One Mile To Go!" mark. My body and my brain had stopped speaking to one another at this point.

Mile 12: Brain: This is 12? We have .42 to go? Why does the finish line seem so far away? Are you SURE it's less than half a mile away? There are a lot of people standing here, I guess we must be close, but it seems a lot farther away than that..." Body: "LET'S DO THIS!!!"

Mile 12.41: Body: "Did they move the finish line? I think it was closer a minute ago." Brain: "JUST GO!"

Mile 12.43: Brain: "Ooh! Shiny!" Body: "Ow."

So, that was my race.

I finished in about 2:13, which was a couple of minutes faster than my goal. I was shooting for 2:15. Next year I want to try to get in under two hours. I'm not a great runner - I'm never going to finish in the top three or the top 10 or even place in my age group. But for a girl who has never been athletic and has always been a little (a lot) self-conscious about her weight, finishing Dam to Dam under goal is a pretty proud achievement. And it turns out maybe I am a little bit athletic... just not in team sports :)

Speaking of weight, here's what I ate with no guilt whatsoever after my run yesterday:

• 1 bottle of ice blue Gatorade
  
• Half of a brick-sized Rice Krispie treat from Trader Joe's
  
• A tall java chip frap from Starbucks. Not light (no whip, though)
• A piece of chocolate bundt cake
• French fries
• Shrimp
• Scallops
• Cheddar Bay Biscuits (yes... we had a Red Lobster gift card. What can I say?)
• Half of a cherry Icee
• A garden salad

It would have been more, but I opted for a nap between about 12:30 and 3:00 which cut into my eating time. :)

Ooh, one more thing: the LUSH Wiccy Magic Muscles Massage Bar has been my hero the past two days. It is some good shit. It's got aduki beans that feel good on your skin when you rub it over sore muscles, and the bar itself has cinnamon and peppermint that sinks into your skin to soothe the aches. It's the reason I'm not walking like John Wayne after a three-day horse ride today. It's kind of like upscale Icy-Hot, and it moisturizes, too. SO GOOD. Pricey, but definitely worth it.

My Reading List Got Detoured

As you can see below, I was supposed to start reading On the Road when I finished The Secret of Lost Things. Instead I got sidetracked by this:


So typical. :) After reading the first couple of chapters, I'm starting to think all classics should be re-worked into zombie books.

Randomness

Reading: Next on the List: Just Finished:

Listening to: Watching: Just Bought:

Can't Wait For:

Meel-ee-wauk-ay: Algonquin for "The Good Land"

So we had a lovely long weekend in the land of cheese and beer and sausage last weekend so I could enjoy my two very favorite bands: The Killers (duh) and Flight of the Conchords.  Here's how it went down:

Thursday night we rolled into town and went for dinner at Karl Ratzsch's. It's a German restaurant and we thought we would have some steins of beer and sausages and sing polkas and be merry, but it's not really that kind of restaurant.  We still had beer and sausages but it was a little more stuffy than clanking steins together and merrily blabbing out the words to the Beer Barrel Polka.  That's my dinner in the picture there.  Mmmmm.  The hot mustard sauce is to die for.  I could have eaten it with a spoon. Paul had a not-so-German pork chop, but it came with sauerkraut so I guess you can call it Bavarian.  Or something. Paul very much enjoyed his massive beer, and I thought I would hold off until the concert to have a beer, which was STUPID, because one beer and one water cost $12 at the Eagles.  Duuuhhhh.  Why don't I ever remember how much it costs to drink at concerts?!

I will spare you most of my Killers pictures because I'm

 sure you've seen them before, but let me pick out a particularly good one... well hello, Mr. Flowers. I'm not sure what it is, but there is something sexy about rolled up shirt sleeves.  Brandon Flowers or not, I mean. So when BFlo does it, it's a double whammy.  Raawrrr.  I couldn't see very well most of the show, but I guess that's OK.  This was my fifth time seeing them and they pretty much did the exact same set they did in January in Minneapolis, but switched around a little.  Plus, because of my horrible view, I managed to guilt Paul into sticking around after the show to see if we could get a picture or something.  Only Ronnie came out, and he chatted for a bit but no one was taking pictures or asking for autographs and I didn't want to be That Girl so I didn't ask either.  Damn BFlo has evaded me once again.  Maybe next time.

Friday we did a lot of shopping... TOO much shopping, judging by my credit card.  But we also toured the Miller brewery.  Three nearly full-sized samples at the end of the FREE tour, peeps. You'd be grinning if you had just downed a Miller Lite, a Miller Genuine Draft and a Leinie's Sunset Wheat in the span of about 15 minutes too.  I LOVE the Leinie's Sunset Wheat, by the way.  Delish. 

We also went to a Brewers game, which was way fun.  I'm officially adopting them as my second team... the Cubs being the first, of course.  There's just something magical about Wrigley.

 But Miller Park is a great venue and I love that fans tailgate before games. I LOVE how much Milwaukeeans love their beer in general, actually.  I wrote a post about the Brewers and Miller Park today so I won't pump you full of too much trivia here.  Suffice it to say that even though the Brewers lost, I had a good time.

Saturday we had tried Real Chili, which is apparently a Marquette favorite.  I could totally see that on a cold day - it's chili with spaghetti in it.  Well, you don't have to get spaghetti, but I'm telling you that you should.  It was yummy.  You also get to pick your sides... onions, jalapenos, sour cream and cheese. Oyster crackers come automatically.  SO GOOD, and so cheap.  You can get it in three levels of hotness and then adjust that to your liking with hot sauce and vinegar on the table.  Medium was sufficiently hot for me... made my nose run a little, it was that spicy.  But delicious.  We also went to the Pabst Mansion and checked that out but no pictures were allowed, so no pictures for you either.  It was pretty interesting, though, and our 85-year-old tour guide started coughing about halfway through the tour and then said she wished she had a beer right about now.  I'm telling you, I think people in Wisconsin are born drinking!

Before we went to Flight of the Conchords, I took Paul to the Safe House.  Imagine you're James Bond or Mata Hari and you're on the run; you need a place to duck into for a while where you can lay low and, hey, maybe enjoy a drink.  What's the point of being James Bond if you can't enjoy a Vesper, right?  I won't spoil any of the surprises for you, except the one in the picture, but it has all the trappings spies need to keep themselves entertained.  We didn't get to use the secret exit but I did find it this time... last time it eluded me. I'm going to tell you that Burt resides in the girls' bathroom, but I'll let you find out for yourself what happens if you try to look under his heart.  Hmmm.  SO!  On to Flight of the Conchords.  

They were awesome and hysterical, but I was a little embarrassed because people kept yelling things out.  This isn't an improv show, people, this is just like going to a concert.  They've prepared a set and when  you yell things you're disrupting the flow.  At first they rolled with it, but after the same guy yelled "I love you Bret" the fifth time, I couldn't hardly blame Bret when he replied, "What?  You said you have to go?  That's a shame."  They were visibly annoyed by all of the yelling, but that didn't really stop people from yelling.  However, they were still awesome, as you can see by my Suga'Lumps video: